Thursday, September 15, 2005


Today . . . a transition.

Today I finally head home from my parents’ place to get back to my old life. It’s been almost 5 weeks since the beginning of this entire ordeal – from the initial attack, to the constant pain for a few days, to GWU Hospital, to Sacred Heart Hospital, to the surgery, to my parents place and, subsequently, recovery.

Sometimes at points in my life, I have wondered how life will be different a year from now. When I reflect on this entire 5-week experience, what are the things I will remember most? I have already forgotten about some of the pain I went through. In truth, I don’t really remember much about the hospital at all. And the time at my parents’ place, that I thought would drag on forever, has seemed to pass somewhat quickly and painlessly. I guess the scar down my chest will be the constant reminder, but even that will fade with time, as Dad’s has done in the last 4 years.

Wondering where I will be a year from now also reminds me where I was a year ago. On September 15th, 2004, I was on my first “official” date with Ex#5 (I say “official” because we ended up going out two times before the date we had set as a first date). A year ago, just like today, September 15th seemed full of promise and hope for a bright future, good times and many happy days. In many ways, there are a lot of similarities between Ex#5 and my new heart:

Both gave me refreshing outlooks on life when life seemed bleak and unlivable. Both brought me out of a dark time in my life when everything seemed hopeless. Both filled my life with new possibilities. Both introduced me to a wonderful group of people who dedicated themselves to my happiness. And both will be in my life until my life is no longer – one way or another.

The Ides of September will come to mean a day of transition – when I annually reflect on my year and evaluate from where I have come, and decide to where I shall go. On September 28th, I finally move to Chicago to begin the next phase, if not the next half, of my life. The world again seems full of opportunities and possibilities. And with a new heart, and my friendship with Ex#5, I take a deep breath . . . and step the next step.