Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Fight Club

Got an email from my friend Brian in DC last week. We were basically just catching up when I read the part where he put a whooping on someone's ass in a bar for making rude comments about Brian's boyfriend.

Now Brian is about the size of my left leg (or maybe my right leg when my ankle isn't swollen). He looks like a good puff of wind would blow him away. But he's a tough little shit. And fiercely loyal. So I imagine he put a wicked hurtin' on the guy. To quote Brian:

So i ended up on top of him punching his face in and everyone was watching. It looked bad but he deserved it. Queens standing at the bar were saying that's the worst beat down i've ever seen then i laughed inside when i heard that. lol.
Personally I wouldn't mess with him. I don't fight the small scrappy types. They scare me. I've been out with Brian and I have seen him sweetly and politely dispel aggressive men. Brian's hot, and he gets more than his share of attention. But I have always seen him be respectful. So if he put a smackdown on a dude, then it must have been warranted.

So I responded to his email by telling him:

So you gave a whomping to some jackass huh? You go girl! I don't think we fags fight enough. I mean like "knock down, drag out, beat him til he bleeds" fight. Gay men cross the line more than any other group of people as far as disrespect, and we have been conditioned to accept it. If I felt up a woman in a straight bar, my ass would be kicked out and I might even get sued. But when someone constantly grabs my chest in a gay bar, no one does anything about it and I am basically told to deal with it. So I am proud of you for standing up for yourself and your man. Excellent job!
And I really feel this way. By nature, I am a pretty easygoing guy. But I have had to get in a fight with someone in the past for something I believed in. No, I don't think violence is the answer. And I know that the ability to reason is one of the things (besides the ability to accessorize) that separates us from animals. But when behavior has gone unchecked and unpunished for so long, sometimes something else needs to happen. Lesbians have been doing it forever, but gay men have been reduced to throwing drinks at each other as a form of protest. Sometimes, that's just not enough.


  1. one time I open faced slapped a guy for grabbing me in my no no area. I would have punched him but he grabbed me while standing behind me so the turn slap seemed the appropriate response.

  2. Dop-

    I completely agree with you and your friend Brian. I also don't advocate violence either, but sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself. I myself get extremely aggravated at the fact that there are some men who think just because you are in a gay bar they have the right to come up and grab your crotch. That just irridates the piss out of me. The next time it happens, I'm going to knock the shit out of someone. I just feel that we as gay men are under this perception that we will just take it and I feel that we should not always accept things. We need to stand up for ourselves when appropriate.